Things I used to forget before I had a place to write them down...etc.

From Et cetera

It's a strange feeling to be hopelessly trapped in social situations. In my most recent example, stress is the primary trigger set awry to exacerbate my fragile state of mind. There I was, everything was okay, and then in comes the voice of someone else, quite irritable, who says something that is stern but only subtly angry. These words are such that they couldn't possibly improve the situation but rather only cause misery for those present who are actually involved and clearly have no problem with the way things are going despite the new guy's desire to go and screw it all up. Personally, I feel as though I could have argued against the point made by the outside observer and won. But even though I do feel as though I could have come out on top in the argument in a normal setting, it would have been pointless to bring up any contrary points in this setting because the opposition in question is one that would certainly not acquiesce defeat and is undoubtedly a master of overpowering condescension. The kind of backtalk that I am not of the social integrity to withstand.

There is a certain breed of people who refuse to admit loss and will fight to the death over the smallest of things; I'm sure we've all met one or two. In fact, for a long time, I was certain that I was such a person but somewhere along the line, the futility of that kind of attitude slapped me across the face like a large trout and here I am. Sometimes I think that it's an attitude that evolves naturally out of conflict and it's up to you to repair it. Other times, I swear that only time will heal that birth scar and until then you'll just have to suffer at the bottom of the food chain in the great social jungle that is the human community. So basically, my point is, I have no point. That's not the point, I just really don't have a point. No point. Yep.