Things I used to forget before I had a place to write them down...etc.

From Et cetera

Lettuce is starting to bother me. Don't get me wrong, I like lettuce and all, but I just don't understand why we do eat lettuce but we don't eat grass. Well, I eat grass, but that's not what I mean. All that lettuce is is leaves, right? Of course. Whose idea was it to actually eat these leaves? Same people who came up with bottled water and 8-track tapes, I would think.

Speaking of which, whose idea was it to eat any item at all in the first place? I'm beginning to think that all those low-budget cartoons about extremely stupid cavemen are veritable documentaries. "Hey guys, see this yak meat!? Why don't we put it in the speaking hole and while crushing it with our mouth bones, we could swallow it like we do air!" It's a ridiculous idea to the objective observer. It makes me wonder how many other orifices they tried to put food in before finding the right one. "What about that one, Bob?" "No, it doesn't fit--however, it is quite pleasurable."

Speaking of classmates, there's an extremely large amount of barely literate people in high school these days. It's alarming. When the teacher askes someone to read out loud, they always stumble on every sentence. That, and they read as though the only punctuation is a period at the end of each line.

Speaking of difficulty in school, can someone please tell me why it is that the three angles within a triangle always add up to precisely 180 degrees. I can draw any random triangle /_\ (something like that) and I'll bet if I had a protractor, there is just no way that it'll add up to 180 degrees. Well, maybe it will. But my question is why!?

Speaking of changing to a completely unrelated topic, I think that this picture of an old Amish guy holding a fried salmon is just hilarious. Same goes for homeless people who eat fish bones. No, it has to be salmon bones.

10% of 10% is 1%. That's a fascinating equation. Also, 1% of 1% is 0.01%, which is the same answer as 1% divided by 100. Ah, but get this: 100% of 100% is 100%.

On the subject of mindless truths, why does Pythagorean Theorem work all the time? a²+b²=c²? Okay, that seems logical until you find out that it's all about triangles. Now I'm back on the subject of triangles--why is it that mathematics about triangles don't make any sense? Take the cone, for instance. In order to calculate the volume of a cone, you use the same formula as you would to calculate the volume of a cylinder and then multiply that by 1/3. This means that three cones could fit inside a cylinder as long as the radius of the circular face of the cone is equal to that of the cylinder. Now, when I look at a cone and a cylinder with identical circular faces, there is no way that three of those cones are going to fit in one of those cyclinders. It simply wouldn't fit. I know it does...but I swear, it doesn't work that way. As I see it, my eyes and my brain tell me that you'd get two cones, and then maybe a bit more. Two and a bit, no more. This is my math!

Michael Ondaatje hasn't taken much credit for writing The English Patient. His name never came up in the Oscars or anything like that. I think that happens far too much. Writers of the stories to great films aren't often credited unless they directed the damn thing.

You know what would be a good course? Cauliflower 101.